So how have you been? It's been seven years since my last blog post and a lot has happened in that time. I wanted to take a few minutes just to thank you for being a part of this website and to give you an update on what I am doing with this site goig forward.

The website

I've decided that the site needs a bit of an overhaul because a lot of the information here is outdated and some things have clearly changed. I'm taking some time to do this already and I will be expanding the content slightly. In the past, the site always focussed on me as a pure crossdresser. That's changed a little as my life has evolved and I'd like to reflect that journey better. I won't be removing any content but as I recognise myself more as trans / non-binary, I'll be discussing some of that transition and how it has changed my view on certain topics over the years.

Basically I'm going to bring all the information up to date and expand more into discussions around disphoria and other topics.

Juliette, dressing, Youtube etc...

In 2019 / 2020, I reached a point where I didn't think I had anything more to say on Youtube and I felt like I would be repeating the same ground by redoing makeup videos and the same tips etc... Essentially I believed that the older videos would always be there as an archive and people would be able to go back through those and get whatever they needed from them. In other words, I felt I had reached a plateau in my crossdressing and I was highly unlikely to have any new or interesting experiences to share.

With 2025 this has changed somewhat and there are new and old topics that I would like to cover now. However, my main interest is in supporting our community and in advocating for the rights of all the amazing trans / genderfluid people out there. I sought to avoid political contect for many years but it feels like I have more skin in the game today and to not say more would be a waste.

Anxiety, food, addiction and unhappiness...

As I've mentioned on this site, I am a recovering alcoholic and a former smoker. In fact, I quit drinking 20 years ago this year. Going into 2025, that anniversary suddenly jumped out at me and made me think a little about my current situation.

I'm always very open with people about my drinking. I volunteer the information all the time. It's one of those stories that lets people know exactly where you are and seems to have a very happy ending (I'm usually refusing an offer of alcohol when it comes up). It's a really easy icebreaker for me in a conversation with someone new... 'No thanks, I won't have a drink, I haven't had a drink for -x- years...'. Instant conversation starter. And it makes me look good, really determined, positive, something of a winner. What's not to like?

Having said that, I don't usually talk too much about how much I eat. That's where I'm still weak and have little control over my actions. I love food. I make my own bacon, I cook a lot and I will happily eat about 2 to 3 thousand calories worth of chocolate and biscuits in one evening. In general my diet is pretty good, lots of vegetables, well balanced meals and a healthy amount of calories, except for the mad binges on snacks etc... I've always told myself that because I manage my weight (80kg more or less), I am OK to behave like this and it's all right because I exercise as a compensation. Then on New Year's Eve 2024 I had a blood test as part of a general checkup with the NHS.

It turns out that I have a cholesterol level of 7.7, that's where all the saturated fats have been going... In case you were wondering, 7.7 is considered to be extremely high. According to the NHS, this means I have the heart of a 63 year old. So what to do about it?

To start with, I am on a diet and I am working to reduce my binge eating. I've lost 4 kilos already and feel a lot better but I feel strongly that I am in a better place to do this mentally for one key reason...

Gender Journey

Today I still crossdress in that I still make a special effort to go out with as feminine a presentation as I can. However, I have for some time referred to myself as genderfluid, genderqueer or non-binary. 2025 has been a big year in this regard as I have taken some decisive steps towards addressing my gender more positively.

As a non-binary person, I have made the conscious decision to try to better reflect my gender identity on a daily basis. This has taken the form of having permanently longer nails (unless I break one), growing my hair out and blending my wardrobe into one set that reflects the style that I want to present.

In addition, I have received a diagnosis of gender disphoria / gender incongruence and am starting a path (albeit cautiously) towards some form of treatment for that. This is most likely to be hormone treatment but I have no plans to move towards surgery at this time. So I hope to have much more to discuss on that subject on the website and to start to provide some information on how I navigated that step in this journey.

Let's wrap it up there...

So thanks for making it this far. I hope to do much more to make this website a useful resource for anyone and to ensure that it's around and relevant for a few more years. Thanks for all of your support over the years and I look forward to bumping into some of you in the future xxx